The Post That Mom and Grandma Aren't Allowed to Read

This post is subtitled: "What Goes to Vegas, Stays in Vegas," or "The American Girl Who Went to Vegas With a Car...And Came Back Without." (yes, that's a slightly pathetic attempt to spoof a Hugh Grant movie)

Here's the story:

Jana was in Vegas on her very first grown-up business trip and since it's only about a three and a half hour drive from Claremont, I decided to drive up Tuesday after class and party with her. I packed a light overnight bag, hopped in my trusty, rusty '93 blue Oldsmobile "Brunhilde" (which, by the way, just a month ago drove all the way from Salt Lake to Claremont with NO problems whatsoever) and planned on getting to the Monte Carlo by 7:30. At about 6:30 I was jamming out to Journey's "Seperate Ways," a song which demands volume. I checked my rear-view mirror and saw that everyone behind me was merging away. I was a little offended until I noticed the smoke Bruni was puffing into their faces. Not. Good. I quickly pulled off onto the shoulder, and, assuming the car had overheated, let her sit for about thirty minutes or so. On the plus-side, there was a really cool sunset. Way to go, Sunset.

After a proper cool down, Bruni seemed ready to roll again. We set off with my eyes glued to the thermometer and ears pealed for strange noises. Such noises appeared around 7:30, just about half an hour outside of Vegas, and they were bad noises. Very bad. I pulled over again and knew she wasn't going to make it. I made some phone calls to Jana and AAA (thanks for the membership, Papa Bear!) and hunkered down to wait for the tow-truck. He showed up between 8:30 and 9 and towed me to Silverado Ranch, about 9 miles from the strip, singing country songs all the way. Jana had carpooled with her coworkers so she didn't have her car, and they were all at dinner west of Vegas, so I walked from the auto-shop to Walmart and bought a Lunchable to hold me over until Jana's coworkers finished dinner and could come pick me up. I don't know why a Lunchable, it just sounded good at the time. I decided to walk a little over a mile down to Las Vegas Blvd to see if there were any buses that could take me down to the strip. There weren't. Jana called and said that her coworkers were on their way and I should stay put so they could find me. I found a bench at a deserted bus stop and sat down to eat and decided to get some homework done while I was waiting. When John and Dave found me, they joked that they were excited to get home and tell their wives that they picked up a young blonde on Vegas Blvd. I assume they're going to leave off the part about how said blonde was eating a Lunchable and reading Kierkegaard....

I finally arrived at the casino around 11 and was reunited with my long lost sister. I dumped my stuff in Jana's room, we got a quick, LATE, dinner at the food court and strolled down to the Bellagio to watch the fountains. I liked 'em.

We wandered around a bit more and headed back to the Monte Carlo around 12:30 or 1 to find the guys deeply absorbed in the craps table and Diablo's Wheel. I decided to try my luck... :-) John had won about $500 at craps but lacked the patience to teach me how to play, so I just handed him 40 bucks and let him win it for me :-) I stood next to him and every once in a while he'd say, "we want a six...we really want a six" so then I'd cheer if a six was rolled. I'm real good at craps. In about twenty minutes John had turned my 40 into 125 big ones. I gave him a $5 tip for not losing my money, and happily pocketed my $80 extra. We stayed at the craps tables, with Jana playing wife/mother by holding on to the guys' winnings so they wouldn't blow them, until about 2:30 then called it a night.

I slept in the next morning while Jana went to class, then woke up and had to deal with grown-up things. No fun. I called the auto-shop and they told me that my engine was eating itself. Seriously, those are the words they used. They just laughed when I said "So you're telling me I'm not gonna make it back to Southern California..." Bruni was officially dead. Mad props to Jana for helping me be a grown-up. I booked a seat on a Greyhound back to Claremont and made arrangements to donate my dead car to some charity. Then some of the guys needed to go to H&M to get stuff for their wives, and Jana and I certainly weren't going to turn down that opportunity, so we went to H&M with about 6 of her male coworkers who told us that we had a twenty minute maximum. Ha. Mad props to them for not being too mad at us for going thirty minutes over our alloted time :-) They then took us out to the auto shop to clean my car out and for me to kiss her goodbye. Sigh. My poor girl.

Jana and I really wanted to go on the roller coaster at New York New York before we left so the guys, even though they really just wanted to get on the road, took pity on us and we all blew $14 on a roller coaster. That was pretty good times...maybe not $14 worth of good times, but good times nonetheless. Who knew real-estate appraisers could be so fun? I sure didn't.

After the roller coaster the guys dropped me off at the Vegas Greyhound station. I love Greyhound, it's such an adventure! Three years ago I took a Greyhound to Colorado and back for a friend's wedding and had a great time. I made a new pot-head friend named Zane who involved me in a deep philosophical conversation, bought me a Gatorade, and fell asleep on my shoulder. He was good times. As I was waiting in line to board the bus to LA, a man walked in the door, stumbled up to me and muttered something like "You look like the kind of girl who wants to go to Nashville," followed by some unintelligble grumbling. I don't know why I don't find things like that scary...maybe it's because we dealt with it every day in Germany (missionaries are crazy magnets...ask anyone). I rolled my eyes, took a step back, and said "Excuse me, sir," in my most bored voice. He stumbled off for a minute, then came back and said "I know what you're like...girls are all the same," and stumbled out the door. It was kinda funny/sad. I got on the bus and had a row to myself. There was a little girl in front of me who looked to be about a little over a year old. She kept offering to share her Cheetos with me and in the process smashed them all over the back of her seat. I love Greyhound. I turned on my iPod, listened to some amazing music (I have excellent taste, what can I say), watched another beautiful sunset, and had great views of the stars out my window. The rest of the ride passed without incident. We got in to Claremont around 9:45, and I debated about whether to call someone to pick me up from the station or not since my roommates are out of town. My stubbornly independent streak got the best of me, and I decided that two miles really isn't that far to walk through a little college town. I forgot I had two heavy bags and was wearing $3 Old Navy flip-flops. But it was a nice night, and I had plenty of time to think about the advantages of not having a car (more to come on that in a later post). I got home, fed the cat, and crashed. I was carless, out about $100, had sore, filthy feet, but felt that life was great :-)

A super big shout-out to Jana, for rocking it up with me despite the stress, and to the guys at Integra. Again, who knew that real-estate appraisers were so much fun?? Thanks, y'all!!